Julian Jokes

By : Julian Morejon

Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?

A: A bull-dozer.

Q: How do you fit more pigs on your farm?

A: Build a sty-scraper!

Q: What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?

A: An udder failure.

Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?

A: Because they have big fingers!

Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?

A: Spoiled milk.

Q: Why are teddy bears never hungry?

A: They are always stuffed!

Q: Why do fish live in salt water?

A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?

A: Spoiled milk.

Q: Where do polar bears vote?

A: The North Poll

Q: What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

A: Odor in the court!

Q: What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?

A: Ouch!

Q: Why did the snake cross the road?

A: To get to the other ssssssside!

Q: Why are fish so smart?

A: Because they live in schools.

Q: What do you call a cow that won’t give milk?

A: A milk dud!

Q: When is a well dressed lion like a weed?

A: When he’s a dandelion (dandy lion)

Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field?

A: Pleased to eat you.

Q: What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

A: He felt funny!

Q: What fish only swims at night?

A: A starfish!

Q: Why is a fish easy to weigh?

A: Because it has its own scales!

Q: What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?

A: An eggroll!

Q: Why didn’t the chicken cross the road?

A: Because there was a KFC on the other side!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: To show everyone he wasn’t chicken!

Q: Why did the lion spit out the clown?

A: Because he tasted funny!

Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?

A: To prove he wasn’t chicken!

Q: What animals are on legal documents?

A: Seals! Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?

A: A pie-thon!

Q: What is ‘out of bounds’?

A: An exhausted kangaroo!

Q: What did the buffalo say to his son when he went away on a trip?

A: Bison!

Q: Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger?

A: He thought it was a lion!

Q: How do bees get to school?

A: By school buzz!

Q: What do you call a bear with no ears?

A: B!

Q: What animal has more lives than a cat?

A: Frogs, they croak every night!

Q. Why do the French like to eat snails so much?

A. They can’t stand fast food.

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